Monday, March 23, 2009


I'm feeling very sad and overwhelmed tonight. I just have had a sinking feeling all day that I am missing something. I feel like I'm terribly behind in Nate's therapies and care. I'm doing the things the early intervention people have told me to do, but I just know there is more. I've been reading about these programs (neurodevelpment programs) out there that do an intense assessment and set up an aggressive program for us to follow to set Nate up for the greatest success. Of course, these are not covered by insurance and are very expensive. So, I need to spend every moment searching online and reading books to try to make sure I'm doing everything possible.

I barely have energy for Cody right now, so I have that guilt piling up on top of the "not-doing-enough-for-Nate" guilt.

I'm sad....very sad.



  1. Danielle,
    I know that you are giving your best to Nate. Remember you are just at the beginning of the process. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself. Having both a baby and a toddler is exhausting.

    Cody is so fortunate that he has the love and support of Bob and family. He couldn't ask for a better family.

    Mom P

  2. Proverbs 3:5-6

    You cannot do this, but with God all things are possible. He had promised to not give you more than you can handle, and to never leave you alone. Lean in His arms, dear Danielle, when you are too weak to do anything else. And let your brain rest - you did not have this picture of your life in your head a year ago, you cannot even begin to imagine where you will be a year from now. So stop trying - rest in God's now - and He loves Nate more than you ever will, and wants the best for you and him more than you ever could. Hold these things and treasure them in your heart. Be sad, be happy, and live. I love you so much my friend.

  3. danielle, you are one of the strongest, courageous women i have ever met. i am so glad you are cody and nathen's mama. -senna

  4. Danielle, I am so touched by your openness and candor in this forum about mothering Nathan and Cody. Knowing that there is probably so, so much information to cover and therapies to commence... it all must be so incredibly daunting.

    I only hope to wish that you try not to spend your priceless reading/research time (or any precious time recharging yourself) fretting with GUILT! It is such a toxic emotion... you are absolutely doing everything and anything you can by loving those boys and tackling their list of needs every single day from dawn until bedtime (and no doubt through the night too). One day at a time.

    I miss your class SO much. We've been out of town and we are now sick :(
    -Liz and Gabriel